"Aaaaat laaaaaaast!"

I left work this evening with the intention of going to my neighborhood Mexican grocer to pick up something for dinner tomorrow, AND, of course, a six-pack of beer as I did NOT get my drink on this weekend. 

While on the bus ride home I mused my options. 

“Should I get pork or chicken?” I thought to myself as the soundtrack from Saturday Night Fever blared in my ears.  “I mean, I have that half-bottle of black bean seasoning in the fridge….I guess I could do chicken and black-bean for dinner tomorrow….”

I got off the bus and wandered to the grocer while fidgeting with my earphones – they have been giving trouble as one of the wires had a short in it.  I entered the store and went straight to the meat section. 

“Rass!” I thought to myself.  “Seven dolla’ fi three degeh-degeh piece a’ mawgah chicken breast?!  *kiss teet* Mi nah buy none…..” 

(Translation:  “Oh dear!.  Seven dollars for three skinny pieces of chicken breast?  *sound of irritation/exasperation* I don’t think I will buy this today…”)

I checked out the other options available: cooked octopus (erm, no!), catfish nuggets (yum, but HOW does one cook catfish nuggets?  Don’t you have to deep-fry them or something?), rancid looking tilapia….

Then I saw it tucked away in the corner of the display.  That elusive item I have been looking for since I moved to my neighborhood.

Bacalao Pollock Fillet. 

“Rassclawt!” I exclaimed loudly…..shoppers turning around briefly to glance at me.  “Saltfish!” 

Even better- Canadian salt-fish!

The grin on my face was immovable.  I have NOT seen or tasted salt-fish since….well, my last trip to Jamaica over a year ago.  You see, I live in a predominantly Mexican neighborhood and I know they use salt-fish in some recipes, but I swear I have never seen salt-fish sold in that grocer.  Maybe I just wasn’t looking hard enough.  I had always promised myself to travel to the north of the city to buy salt-fish and patties from the Caribbean neighborhood there but never got around to it.  Now – I can cross salt-fish off my ‘To-Do’ list.

Giggling like the little girl I am, I collected the ingredients for my all-time favorite:  salt-fish fritters. 

And mi a go nyam salt fish fritters tonight, tomorrow and the day after! 

My mother’s recipe for salt-fish fritters altered by me for convenience: 

1 ½ cup of flour (roughly)

Ground black pepper

Salt-fish (around ½ lb or more for chunkier fritters)

1 small onion sliced/diced

Escallion – chopped

Tomato- diced

1 egg

Hot pepper sauce OR preferably thinly sliced pieces of scotch-bonnet pepper

Water

Copious amounts of oil – preferably coconut.

Prep salt-fish by cutting into small pieces,  Place salt-fish in microwave-safe bowl, rinse once, then cover with water and nuke on HIGH for 5 minutes.  This will remove excess salt and semi-cook the fish.  Let sit for 5 minutes, drain water, and shred.

Put the flour in a large bowl.  Add black pepper to taste.  Or is you’re like me – add black pepper until the flour looks gray.  Combine dry ingredients thoroughly.  Add water slowly to flour mixture until texture is similar to thick pancake mix – not  watery.

Add egg,  Mix/beat egg into mixture thoroughly.  Add hot pepper sauce/slice scotch bonnet pepper to taste (nuh taste di raw egg mixture – just add what you think is a tolerable amount of hot sauce…)  Stir in chopped onion and scallion.  Add diced tomatoes and shredded salt-fish. 

Let sit for ½ hour.  (Even better – let sit covered in fridge overnight – the spices and fish flavor permeate the flour mixture and the result is positively ORGASMIC…)

Heat frying pan. And oil.  Nuff nuff. The more the better.  Those damn fritters absorb oil better than those things used to sop-up crude oil from an oil spill disaster in the Gulf. 

Using a spoon ladle portions of the batter to make three-inch diameter sized portions.  Lightly brown on each side ensuring that the batter is cooked through to the center before removing from pan.  When cooked, remove from pan and place on plate with paper towels to absorb excess oil.

Cool, then nyam! 

Below is to be played while eating your tasty salt-fish fritters:  

POLITICAL CARTOONS

I fully endorse Mitt Romney as the 2012 GOP presidential candidate

No, you didn’t read wrong, and I’ll say it again:  I fully endorse Mitt Romney as the 2012 GOP presidential candidate. 

Disclaimer:  I am NOT endorsing Mitt Romney as the next PRESIDENT, I am endorsing him as the alternate presidential candidate to Barack Obama. 

Look – whether I like it or not as per the U.S. constitution there is going to be a presidential election this November, AND the country has to decide between two candidates.  Now, y’all know my unwavering support is behind our current president Barack Obama.  However, I have to face the off-chance that he could NOT be re-elected in November.  The American voter is a unique breed:  they’ll probably elect a Democrat-held house and senate in November, but vote Republican with regards to the presidential race.  Like I’ve said before – intelligence and rational is NOT a strong point in this country; cross, guns and  bible clutching reigns supreme…..

Therefore I have to make my peace with what the opposition has to offer – and my pick is Mitt Romney.  His stance on the issues of the economy, social issues and foreign matters is the most tolerable.  To me – he seems the most presidential and one with whom I think would best represent our country on international stage.  If my fellow Americans chose the GOP candidate over our current president in November I’d rather it be Mitt Romney than the parade of morons currently on tour in the southern states: 

Newt Gingrich is not acceptable – he brings too much baggage to the table with his many marriages, his skewed views on the economy, his stance on social issues, and his temper.  His political past has been a checkered one – he was basically fired as speaker of the house in the 90s.  His morals are very, VERY questionable.  He was fined $300,000 for 84 alleged ethic violations by the House Ethics Committee in the 90s – the first time ever in the history of the United States.  And based on recent comments he wants to turn the American labor force into a domestic help labor pool for the rich.  He’s all about the 1%. 

Rick Santorum is a sanctimonious religious zealot OBSESSED with gay sex more than the twink store clerk at Dorothy’s Dildos and More in San Francisco.  He may be the darling of the religious conservatives, but he does not bring confidence or rational ideas to the table.   He would probably consider that publicity whore Sarah Palin as his running mate.  The man is so uptight you could shove a piece of coal up his ass and get a diamond in return….

Ron Paul is a idealist whack-job whose libertarian views on taxes, government and foreign affairs may be too outside mainstream America’s thinking to be acceptable.  He also exploits racism to his advantage – I don’t care how much you protest about your affiliation with a newsletter you published in the past – if your name was on the damn thing then you are endorsing the content.  AND he raised his kids to think the same – his son Rand Paul, an elected official – famously said during his run for office that the Civil Rights Act of the 1960s should be repealed. 

So we’re left with Mitt Romney – and he’s not too bad.  I could live with myself if he was elected. 

But until the fat lady sings:  BARACH OBAMA – SECOND TERM!!!!!!!!!!!

POLITICAL CARTOONS