10 REASONS WHY DEMOCRATS SHOULD HAVE A REPUBLICAN FRIEND...AND 10 REASONS WHY A REPUBLICAN SHOULD HAVE A DEMOCRAT FRIEND

TEN REASONS WHY A DEMOCRAT SHOULD HAVE A REPUBLICAN FRIEND:  

10.  Using the sentence, "I have a close friend who is Republican" is a great discussion ice breaker at parties.

9.  Your Republican friend's irrational stance on faith and values validates any excuse you come up with not to attend church every Sunday.

8. Republican friends make great 'Neighborhood Watch' monitors.  

7.  Republican friends are  never short of white bread.

6. Republican's idea of spicy food is a meal seasoned with anything other than salt or pepper.  

5.  In the winter Republican friends are useful on cold nights for starting fires that involves crossed wooden sticks.  

4.  Republican friends always have an unending supply of white bed linen.  

3.  Republican friends always have a gun if you ever need one - no questions asked.  

2.  When you need to go camping: Republican friends are experts at living in a mobile environment. - especially if they're from the southern states.    

1.  Republican friend(s) are exhibit 'A' for your tolerance of others living an alternate lifestyle.  

TEN REASONS WHY REPUBLICANS SHOULD HAVE DEMOCRAT FRIENDS

10.  Using the sentence, "I have a close friend who is a Democrat" is a great ice breaker to start your own personal lynch party.  

9.  Democrat friends give you something to pray about each and every Sunday at church.  

8.  Your Democrat friends are a great resource tool when you need to describe someone who violated the law.  

7.  Democrat friends are a great source of undocumented labor.  

6. Your Democrat friend knows directions to great targets areas (such as Harlem, Chelsea, Castro District, We-Ho, Boystown, etc. ) when you're in the mood for for a night of drunken early-morning beer-bottle throwing entertainment.  

5.  Your Democrat friend is always experimenting with spicy seasoning such as paprika, curry and cayenne pepper.  

4.  You Democrat friend's house is a solace of peace and quiet from your own 10 kids and third husband. 

3.  Your Democrat friend always has 'the good stuff' to share.  

2.  In times of need you can always rely on finding your Democrat friend at home living off the government and other welfare programs.  

1.  You can depend on your Democrat friends to help you with those new-fangled ideas such as reading, the internet, homework, applying for college, logic, rationale, etc.