Why did God create man?
Because vibrators can't mow the lawn.
What do you call a man with half a brain?
Gifted.
What do men and beer bottles have in common?
They are both empty from the neck up
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
We don't know .... it's never happened.
How can you tell if a man is happy?
Who cares?
How are men and parking spots alike?
The good ones are always taken and the ones left are handicapped.
What does a man consider a seven-course meal?
A hot dog and a six-pack of beer.
Why do men name their penises?
Because they want to be on a first name basis with the person who makes all their decisions.
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.
Why did the man cross the road?
He heard the chicken was a slut.
What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A widow
Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilize one egg?
They don't stop and ask for directions.
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