Okay, okay, most (Jamaicans) know Phyllis Hyman for her hit rent-a-tile song 'Old Friend'. Some might even know her for her other hit 'Living All Alone'.
Recently, the niche-market channel TV One made her the subject of their on-going series "Unsung", an hour-long program about lesser known R&B singers. The show describes life for Phyllis Hymen, first growing up in Pittsburg and her early attempts as a R&B singer, then her time in the clubs of New York singing back-up vocals for known acts of the seventies. It was during one of these performances that she was spotted by record executives and her career began to take off.
A tall (over 5 ft 10 in) and beautiful woman who sometimes modeled part-time, Phyllis was the first choice to sing the title track to the Bond movie "Never Say Never Again", but her version was dropped in favor of Lani Hall of the Brazilian Sergio Mendes band fame. During her career Hyman was also nominated for a Tony for her role in the Broadway musical tribute to Duke Ellington - "Sophisticated Ladies".
Her recorded songs had success on the R&B charts, beginning with her rendition of the Stylistics "Betcha By Golly Wow", then followed with solo releases such as "Don't Wanna Change the World", "Old Friend" and "Living All Alone" to name a few.
She was once married to Larry Alexander, brother of famed Jamaican pianist Monty Alexander but that marriage did not work out and the couple eventually separated. During the eighties and up to her death Hyman battled bipolar and depression along with substance abuse, weight gain and financial problems. She attempted suicide once and failed, but was unfortunately successful in her last attempt in June of 1995.
Why her biography struck a chord with me were the details supplied by her family on her struggle with bipolar disorder and depression, the same illness I struggle with myself. Her album "I Refuse to Be Lonely" released months after her death was a collection of songs that seem to sum up the feelings that Phyllis was going through at the time dealing with her illness.
But it is the lyrics of the title song "I Refuse To Be Lonely" that - although sad - to me is a conviction that although we may be alone, we can chose NOT to be lonely:
"Yes, I am alone
Yes, I'm on my own
But for the first time in my life
I'm gonna carry on."
Yes, I'm on my own
But for the first time in my life
I'm gonna carry on."
"Yes, I'm gonna ache
But I will not break
Some things I can choose
and baby I refuse
to be lonely"
Poignant, isn't it? We can either be lonely, or chose to be lonely. Never saw it that way before. Makes you look at life differently. Be lonely or chose to be.
So from all of us who face the daily challenges of life feeling deserted, alone, naked, venerable, we raise our glasses to you - MISS PHYLLIS HYMAN.
Thanks for the music.
