THE HUMAN RIGHTS CAMPAIGN (HRC) NEEDS YOUR SUPPORT

Again, an appeal for donations for the Human Rights Campaign (hrc.org) - the political arm or the GLBT movement.

The HRC is the largest civil rights organization working to achieve equality for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender Americans, and represents a grassroots force of more than 700,000 members and supporters nationwide.

The HRC envisions an America where gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people are ensured equality and embraced as full members of the American family at home, at work and in every community.

For information on what issues the HRC is working on click here.

To make a donation click here or to purchase HRC merchandise click here.

GREAT WEEKEND IN CHICAGO!!!!!

Tired, sun-burned, mind filled with the sights and sounds of this weekend. I had a cousin and her friend visiting from Ohio and we did Taste of Chicago on Saturday - DAMN!!!

That was a very crowded venue...





I marched in the Chicago Gay Pride parade with the Human Rights Campaign contingent (hrc.org) and handed out stickers; the day before I did the same for HRC at PrideFest 2008.

Now during the winter when people ask why I stay in Chicago I have two people in Ohio that gets it......





Full report later this week.

BUSY, BUSY, BUSY WEEKEND IN CHICAGOLAND!!!

For those of youse who are in, around or nearby Chicago this weekend there is a LOT to see and do!!!!!

CHICAGO PRIDE FEST: Saturday, June 28, the day before Chicago's iconic Pride Parade (Sunday, June 29). Festive ... Jubilant ... Fun ... are just a few of the words to describe this day-long gathering that's a non-stop, early-summer party. Hosted by (and benefiting) the Northalstead Area Merchants Association this equally crowd-pleasing gay and lesbian celebration of community pride will be back bigger than ever in its 6th year! Pride Fest showcases an eclectic lineup of arts & crafts, food and other vendors. It also features entertainment on two stages including one dedicated to some of Chicago's fine performers in the gay community. Click here for more information.






THE 39TH ANNUAL CHICAGO GAY PRIDE PARADE: Sunday June 29 will feature over 250 entries and will be attended by over 400,000 spectators. Among the entries will be marching bands, dance troupes, twirlers, floats by community, media and other such organizations, along with many political figures. For information on this event click here.









TASTE OF CHICAGO opens today June 27th and is considered the world's largest food festival and is the largest festival in Chicago. Every year, millions of Chicagoans, and tourists from around the world flock to Grant Park to enjoy the variety of food prepared by Chicago's most popular restaurants. Events also include live music on multiple stages, informational and family oriented pavilions, and nightly film performances. For more information click here.










CHICAGO CUBS vs THE WHITE SOX CROSSTOWN CLASSIC continues this weekend at U.S. Cellular Field. For information on times and tickets go to the MLB website here.









For other events and happenings in Chicago this and future weekends click here to go to METROMIX Chicago.

Now don't hate because some of us live in Chi-town!!!! Me? I'm scheduled to volunteer at Pridefest and march in Pride. This is gonna be some weekend!!!!!

YOU MUST SHOP ALDI FOR LOW PRICES ON HOUSEHOLD STAPLES

At this time I must 'big-up' (Jamaican to American translation: promote or recognized) a store that is slowly coming across the radar of the American shopper - ALDI stores.

In today's turbulent economic times and high gas prices we all have to look for the best prices on household staples and seek the most cost effective - okay, okay - CHEAPEST way of shopping for everyday items. Up to last year I had never been in an Aldi store. I always wanted to go in and check it out to see if it was the same chain as the one in London an aunt shopped at regularly but never did until another persistent aunt and British uncle dragged me in during their visit to Chicago. It was then I discovered that it WAS the same chain from Europe and the U.K. that sold select items at discount prices.

The chain originated out of Germany and grew into a international empire with stores around the world. (Click here to read the Wikipedia account of it's history.)

Aldi is a great place to find basics staples such as milk, eggs, bread, spices, household cleaners, etc. For example - a can of evaporated milk (that I use in my morning coffee) that regularly sells for $1.25 can be had for 69 cents in Aldi. A 3-pound bag of onions that sells for $2.99 in the supermarket can be had at Aldi for 99 cents. That's $2 less than the normal price! Of course, one of the ways Aldi achieves their low costs is with a no frills approach - pallet stocking of items, store or no-name branding, minimum staffing needed, you have to pay for plastic bags or carry your own, etc.

The bottom line is that this is one place I encourage all who looking to save pennies - click here to find an Aldi store near you.

SOMETHING TO MOTIVATE YOU TOWARDS THE WEEKEND

I'm not sure who some of these are but WHO THE HELL CARES?!!!! ENJOY!

Jensen attwod of 'Noah's Arc' fame

Justin Timberlake

CHICAGO TRAFFIC CONGESTION AND IT'S AILING PUBLIC TRANSPORTATION SYSTEM

Today I had to make a trip into the Windy City at noon and decided the best method would be to drive partway and use the public transportation system for the remainder of the trip downtown to avoid road congestion and high parking fees. Although I could have taken a Metra Train directly from Westmont to Union Station I decided to stick to a tried and true method - from Westmont I drove to the Cumberland Ave Blue Line station via I-88/I-294/I-90, parked and took the 'L' in to the Loop, and did the reverse on return.

My trip to the city was uneventful; however, the return trip at 5 pm put me in the height of evening traffic - which is an oxy-moron in Chicago as traffic is ALWAYS a bad state no matter what time of the day/week/year it is.

It took me 1.5 time slonger to drive home compared to my inward trip to the station. This led me to fume for the umpteenth time over the congestion of the expressways in Chicago and why it seems to get worse and worse each year.

According to quip I head on a sitcom recently "there are two seasons in Chicago - winter.....and road construction."

Wry, but true.

According to a report issued late last year Chicago ranks 3rd as worst in traffic delays amongst 437 urban areas studied in the continental United States. Chicago is just behind New York and Los Angeles when it comes to delays and slow moving trafic. The report attributed this dismal state due to a lag in the building of new roads to increasing traffic, and to a failing public transportation system. Personally I believe that until the Regional Transport Authority - the board overseeing public transportation for the Chicagoland area gets it's act together - Chicago will never be chosen as the pick city the for the 2016 Summer Olympics.

One of the main concerns of the deciding Olympic committee is moving large amounts of sports fans from venue to venue and although we've countered that concern with proof of how we handle hosting major sporting events by moving large crowds without incident (such the Chicago Bears at Soldier Field, The Chicago Cubs at Wrigley Field, and the Chicago White Sox at US Cellular Field) we haven't proved that we can move the even larger crowds an Olympic event will attract.

And rising gas prices will only burden and already old and strained public transportation sytem.

On the bright side - rising gas prices WILL put a strain on the public transportation system and in an election year may FINALLY light a fire under the dormant derrierre of state legislature to invest serious captial in to making the Chicago transport system the envy of other world cities.

Hope, however, is the sustinance on which politicians greedily feed, leaving us with the bare bones of reality once elected.

Click here to see that video clip on the report on congestion in Chicago filed on CBS Chicago in September 2007:

CHICAGO CUBS SWEEPS CROSSTOWN CLASSIC 3-0

Yesterday I went to hallowed ground and watched my first baseball game. I have always wanted to visit the historic Wrigley Field and thanks to the kind invitation of my close friend I got an opportunity to watch a yearly Chicago tradition - the Chicago Cross Town Classic. Yesterday I had the fortune to watch the third of six games in which the Chicago Cubs lead the White Sox 3-0 out of six games.

Chicago boasts two world-class baseball teams - the Chicago Cubs and the Chicago White Sox. (Some may argue that term world-class is redundant as the world series is held for only American baseball teams but I digress.) Each year six games are held between the two teams played at their home courts - three held at Wrigley Field, the home of the Chicago Cubs, and three held at U.S. Cellular Field, home of the White Sox.

The rivalry between both teams stems from the part of Chicago you live or identify with: the Cubs have been associated with the more "yuppie, educated, sophisticated" citizens of Chi-Town, while the White Sox are seen as the champions of the blue-collar society of the south-side of Chicago. The last time the Cubs won a World Series Game was over 100 years ago; the White Sox won in 2005 and find every opportunity to rub their recent win in the faces of Cubs fans.

Now, at this time I'll come clean and admit that this is as far as my comprehension of the entire sport and the world series will go, so now I will focus on my speciality - the male fans.

Three words: OH....MY.....G**!

Fellow gays,puffs, queens, bottoms, dominant tops, leather-lickers, etc (pick a title): if you are looking for a wide assortment of young, good-looking, mid-western, corn-fed, brown hair/green eyed or blonde-haired/blue-eyed parade of hot young studs you must, simply MUST, go to a Cubs game at Wrigley Field. It's no wonder that the gay section of Chicago - Boystown - is located within 5 blocks from Wrigley Field! DAMN!!!! And the clincher - these studs are drunk and vulnerable by the end of the game when stumbling home, out around various dark walkways and alleyways; propositions made at this stage have a 75% of being fulfilled.

*ahem*

Unfortunately, I had to maintain my lady-like social standing while amongst friends and really could not research if this is the accurate percentage. Seriously, the game was a thoroughly enjoyable experience in which I learned a lot about the sport and I must express my eternal thanx to L and J for their tolerance of my numerous questions.

One a serous note: one person I must admit I have taken a fancy to is the Cubs pitcher Ryan Dempster who played a spectacular game and - to me - struck out the White Sox within five minutes of each inning with powerful and precise pitches - GO, RYAN, GO!!!!

Now I can actually follow the rest of the series and determine whether the Cubs (who I support) are screwing up, OR if they will finally break the 100year curse and win a World Series.

Even if they mess up the series I can lust after hot men in tight pants, right?

GO CUBS GO!!! GO CUBS GO!!! GO CUBS GO!!! GO CUBS GO!!! GO CUBS GO!!! GO CUBS GO!!!

A DIFFERENT TAKE ON GAY MARRIAGE

I was checking one of my favorite blog sites - Towleroad, a site with Homosexual Tendencies - when I came across this ditty posted on You Tube on one outcome that can occure due to the legalization of gay marriage in California.

I have no idea who these two are but the short video is absolutely hysterical and should be nominated for something! The producers/actors are creative young men Jeffrey Self and Cole Escola and they seem to be very creative with videos on current subjects. This clip is a skit on one scenario legalizing gay marriage can create and only goes to prove that relationships are between two persons and not only men and women.

Good job guys - you now have a fan!

Click to watch this really funny video:


And here is a previous video of them trying to get tickets to see 'Sex and the City' proving the lengths die-hard 'Sex...City' fans will go to when pushed. I mean, we waited FOUR DAMN YEARS FOR THIS MOVIE!!!!!! Only true fans of 'Sex...City' will get the final 25 seconds of this one!

TASTE OF CHICAGO - A SMORGASBORD OF CULINARY DELIGHT

The Taste of Chicago is the world's largest food festival, held annually for two weeks in Chicago starting the last week of June. The event is the largest festival in Chicago with millions of Chicagoans and tourists from around the world flocking to Grant Park to enjoy the variety of food prepared by Chicago's most popular restaurants.

This year the festival is being held from June 27 to July 6.

Events also include live music on multiple stages, informational and family oriented pavilions, and nightly film performances with musical acts varying from established and emerging local artists, to nationally known artists such as Carlos Santana, Moby, and Kenny Rogers - all performances are free. July 3rd (Independence Eve) is by far the event's most attended day. On July 3rd the city holds its Independence Eve fireworks display. This takes place at dusk off the downtown shore of Lake Michigan, and is often ranked among the most impressive Independence Day pyrotechnic displays in the nation.

The event began in 1980 as a idea by a group of restaurateurs as a way of spotlighting the various cuisines offered in the city. Being a huge success on the first go it has been repeated on an annual basis to growing crowds. Due to the size of patrons the festival is held in Grant Park by the lakefront.

The festival also offers muiscal entertainment from renowned artists - this years top headlines include Chaka Khan and Stevie Wonder.

For more information on visiting Taste of Chicago click here for details.

THE EXPERIENCE OF YOGA IN FLORIDA

After numerous threats and much badgering I was dragged to participate in a yoga class last Tuesday. Although I was apprehensive - seeing that I had been to the gym for at least an hour before and was tired and sweaty - I decided to go as it was something I've always wanted to do. I mean, this was a movement about getting in touch with your inner self and at this point of my asexual life getting intouch with anything involving my body seemed like a good idea.

The determined on drove us to a non-descript strip mall off University Drive in Coral Springs to a small store that specialized in massages and spa treatment. The determined one went ahead to make arrangements while I stood outside finishing a call to a friend.

I entered the enterprise and asked where yoga classes were being held. The young man behind the counter directed me toward the back of the store where I proceeded to get lost in numerous massage rooms. After a few "Hey, I'm in here!" and "I think you're in the wrong place buddy!" I swallowed my genetic aversion towards asking for directions and stopped a spa attendant to show me the way.

I found the room classes were being held and sat down beside the determined one who had removed her shoes in preparation for classes. The yoga instructor was already there setting up for classes - a soft-spoken, lithe man in his late 40s who calmly greeted me and helped me settle in.

Yoga is a group of ancient spiritual practices designed for the purpose of cultivating a steady mind. It originated in India possibly as early as 3300 BC. A practitioner of Yoga is called a Yogi or Yogini. Yoga has been defined as "technologies or disciplines of asceticism and meditation which are thought to lead to spiritual experiences and a profound understanding or insight into the nature of existence." Outside India, yoga is mostly associated with the practice of asanas (postures) of Hatha Yoga, or as a form of exercise. (Courtesy of Wikipedia.)

After a few late arrivals classes began. "Sit in a comfortable position and if you can sit cross-legged with soles together, close your eyes and let's begin.....OOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM......"

At first I found the pace of the class slow and easy to keep up with. A few of the poses such as downward-facing dog, and head-to-knee pose to felt good to the muscles, and warrior I and warrior II made me feel as if I was practicing a ballet move (a dream of mine), but three-quarters through the class the positions became challenging - especially such as the wheel pose and the flying crow - and I kept thinking, "you want my WHAT to go WHERE?! Are you buying me a drink after that movement buddy-boy?!"

One the whole the class was an interesting experience that really is a even-paced workout I could get used to.

Maybe I might just look into this further.....

CHICAGO PRIDE SET FOR JUNE 28/29

The HRC is seeking volunteers to participate in this year’s Chicago Pride Fest celebrations. This year the event is being held on Halstead between Grace and Addison, right smack in the middle of Boystown, between 11 am through to 9 pm on Saturday June 28.

Chicago Gay Pride will be held on Sunday June 29^th beginning at 12 noon. As usual - they're looking for volunteers to help in this years march.

For more information or to sign up to volunteer click here.

VISITING FLORIDA FOR A SHORT WHILE...

I may have a few things to report n while I am down here but really too busy soaking in the Forida sun......

WHY WE CELEBRATE GAY PRIDE IN JUNE

Worldwide, June is celebrated as GAY PRIDE month (for those of us who can) and is recognized as the month of acceptance to welcome diversity in communities regardless of sexual orientation. Celebrations during the month is meant to recognize the impact Gay, Lesbian and Transgender individuals have had on the world.

PRIDE marches are organized each year in June to celebrate gay pride in world-cities such as Toronto, Chicago, Los Angeles, London, Paris, Berlin, Rome, Sydney, Mexico City, etc. Gay and lesbian groups also celebrate this special time with picnics, parties, memorials for those lost from HIV and AIDS, and other group gathering events that attract thousands upon thousands of individuals. The international impact has been so influential to so many people that it makes for a perfect time for an organization to be a part of the festivities.

Why June? It was during this month in 1969 that riots outside the Stonewall Inn in New York began the modern Gay Rights Movement. Although there had been organizations and activists working for gay rights preceding this event, it was the response to this event did that makes it a milestone for the gay rights.

In a nutshell, in the 60's NY police regularly made raids on establishments that the gay community patronized. Raids were commonplace and held earlier in the day when establishments had few customers. However on June 28, 1969 the police raided Stonewall at 1 am when it was packed with clients, and were met with resistance that grew into a protest heard around the world that mobilized the gay community into action. For a more detailed and very interesting look at the start of the gay rights movement click here.

Although no one can pin-point exactly why this one incident brought the community together in such a force of solidarity I have my own theory: they raided Stonewall when drag queens were enforce.

Think about it - these are persons who have no qualms about sashe-ing around during the day (when they are not in costume) with long nails, plucked eyebrows, enduring public insults, ridicule and physical abuse - yet when in a dangerous situation they are still not afraid to speak their mind and do not give a shit what others think. I feel that on that day in 1969 they had enough of the raids and disrespect and fought back. I mean, some even refer to this date as the "hairpin drop heard around the world..."

I have always admired them for their strength - and am actually a bit scared of them.

Since Stonewall advances in rights fo the LGBT community has made large gains despite legal obstacles and the anti-gay rhetorhic of some religious organizations. Today, gay marriage is recognized in Belgium, Canada, Netherlands, South Africa and Spain, with same-sex civil unions recognized in a majority of developed nations. In the United States, advances are being made in this area with two states now recognizing gay marriage, and a number of states either recognizing same-sex civil unions or are in the midst of making a decision on this issue. The push is on for many states to include sexual-orientation as a protected class under discrimination laws.

Here in Chicago, PRIDE Week begins June 22nd culminating with the PRIDE parade - attended by at least 400,000 persons - on Sunday June 29th in Boystown.

(Click here for Chicago PRIDE information.)

Recently, some have questioned that with such advances in gay rights does the community still see the need to march each June. The answer is quite simple - we'll march until members of the LGBT community can stand equal with the same rights and protection as heterosexual couples.

Besides, we have to march each summer - it's written in the bible:

"PRIDE cometh before the fall......."

JUST A FEW CARTOONS TO MAKE YOU GIGGLE

(THIS ONE IS DEDICATED TO MY FELLOW BRETHREN WHO GREW UP OUT NUMBERED BY SISTERS)

YOUNG HEAT TIMES THREE

What's better than one of this?

THREE OF THEM!!!!!!!

No, you're not seeing one of those dumb email photo gags. Remember those sentimental ads by the then Cingular Wireless about the young lads coming home to see their mum at Christmas? (Click here to jog your memory.)

Turns out these lads are fitness models tour the country making appearances and have done even some work for designer Tom Ford - that have led to them with a huge, HUGE gay following - giving rise to the phrase 'triplet fantasy' dominating the blogs of quite a few gay men.

Can't seem to find out much information about them - except that I'm not the only one who wants to know more about them!!!!! The only thing I am sad to report is that they are 100% heterosexual (damn) - who are appreciative of their large gay fan base.

Nicholas, Criag and Ryan. Or is it Craig, Ryan and Nicholas? Or is is Ryan, Nicholas and Craig?
WHAT ORDER ARE THEY IN?!












What a beautiful blue sky.....YEAH RIGHT, SCREW THE SKY - I'VE GOT MUSCULAR ABS IN THE VIEWFINDER CAPTAIN!!!














Raising the temperature of this body of water....













This is a picture from that Tom Ford ad campaign - WHO IS HIS CLIENTELE - S&M SHOPPERS?!

10 WAYS TO GRACIOUSLY SWITCH FROM BEING A CLINTON SUPPORTER TO CHEERING ON BARACK OBAMA

With the primary season officially over Clinton supporters face a difficult decision – switching their allegiance to presumptive Democratic presidential nominee Barack Obama. Here are a few helpful tips to get even the most hardened Clinton supporter to switch side with dignity and aplomb:

1. In the dead of night remove all ‘Hillary for President’ bumper stickers, yard signs, and window posters plastered all over your home and car. WORD OF CAUTION: do not wear dark clothing while conducting this nocturnal activity or else be prepared for physical interrogation by community police patrol leading to possible appearance on hit TV show ‘COPS’.
2. Install in all windows visible to the public ‘OBAMA FOR PRESIDENT’ posters hastily printed on generic color ink-jet printer. Again, preferred time for said activity is dead of night, please follow previously stated caution.
3. Send an ‘OBAMA FOR PRESIDENT’ email to all in your email contact list - make sure email contains the standard ‘rabid Obama supporter’ theme in the message body. Block from your POP server all shocked email responses from friends and blame your company’s IT department.
4. While clutching your chest with puzzlement and shock defend your stance to adamant questioners that you always said, “I support an OBAMA/Clinton ticket” and insist they didn’t hear the Obama part.
5. Send a small contribution to the Obama campaign to show your commitment. To counteract the disbelief and nausea that you contributed to “the Obama campaign?!” donate an equivalent amount to the DNC – Howard Dean won’t mind, trust me.
6. Begin copying dressing style of future First Lady Michelle Obama. NOTE: Male readers must refrain from wearing a knock-off of the Maria Pinto mauve dress to the gym – that’s just too liberal.
7. When confronted by friends, shift the topic of conversation to how old McCain looked and that he must have served in the armed forces during the American Civil War. Only do this while standing at least 50 feet from any nearby delusional Republicans.
8. Instead of greeting your significant other with a peck on the lips – do a cute knuckle-tap that will make anyone nearby go, “Awwwwww, how sweet!”
9. Swallow hard and sit down with your kids to give them the talk you’ve been dreading: how to correctly spell P-R-E-S-I-D-E-N-T O-B-A-M-A.
10. AND FINALLY, as in all relationships, burn all Clinton paraphernalia in a huge bonfire in your backyard as a symbolic end of your past relationship – stifle any loud sobbing into a handy fluffy pillow. Try not to suffocate yourself in despair.

A FAREWELL TRIBUTE TO SEN. HILLARY CLINTON

I thought it was only fitting I do SOMETHING to express my support for the candidate I backed all these months,hell - YEARS - so see my handiwork below.

After all - a dream for many has been shattered
...*SOB*...

OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD.....

Please excuse the lack of new posts as my battle with the bloody router has now been extended to the stupid ass modem that Comcast INSISTS on me using. The bleedin' thing is giving me trouble and a technician is scheduled to come out on Saturday to replace it - until then I try to upload what I can during the 5 minutes each hour that I have internet (and telephone service).

I hate monopolies.........

DISNEY HAS NEW WINNING CARTOON

While sitting by the cell phone waiting for it to ring with news of possible employment has given me a chance to get slightly addicted to the the new Disney Channel cartoon short 'Phineas and Ferb'.

The cartoon revolves around the daily escapades of two brothers - Phineas and Ferb - who plan outrageous schemes each day during their summer vacation. Being genii they have the capabilities of building in their backyard a beach with huge waves for surfing, huge roller coasters, monster trunk racing arenas, time machines to travel back to the Jurassic period, , etc. - all during the their mother's daily trips to the mall, supermarket and other such suburban routines. Their older sister Candace is always left in charge during these excursions, where she plots to catch her brothers in the midst of their shenanigans to report to their mother to score brownie points - as all sisters do!

During all of this their pet platypus Perry disappears and turns into Secret Agent Perry the Platypus who foils the evil schemes of his evil genius nemesis Heinz Doofenschmirtz before resuming his secret identity of being the boys harmless pet.

Why I love this show are the underlying adult references to: same-sex relationships, the 'Jerry Springer Show', show tunes, marital affairs, and yes - swearing. I have to rewind to double check that I really did hear Doofenshmirtz say "son-of-a bi..." before the tree branch whacks the last word from being uttered, or when Candace sarcastically utters "oh mutha-.....before something heavy lands on her, or the episode where pigeons are brainwashed to dump two tons of shit - au natural - during a presentation at city all. This is the style of the creators who describe their humor "strong" and "funny" with adult references undecipherable to children - a theme that Disney embraces in their successful feature-length movies.

The unique songs that play during each episode - even reggae musice - and the catchy opening title sequence are the icing on the cake.

Watch 'Phineas and Ferb' on the Disney Channel (check local listings) or click here to watch online.

And don't forget to watch America's (and my own) favorite teenage pop star sensation Hannah Montana!

C'mon - sing along with me:

Oh yeah
Come on

You get the limo out front
Hottest styles, every shoe, every color

Yeah, when you're famous it can be kinda fun
It's really you but no one ever discovers

Who would of thought that a girl like me
Would double as a superstar

You get the best of both worlds
Chillin' out, take it slow
Then you rock out the show

You get the best of both worlds
Mix it all together and you know that it's the best of both worlds!

SWANSONG

Hat's off to a strong, determined woman
Long and hard
She's fought a good fight,
Her words have been heard
Her position made clear
Now, there's a change in the air

A good battle has been fought,
Internal disputes to placate
Now is the time for all Democrats
To rally around our
Presumptive presidential candidate

We've made history so far
There's a lot at stake
United, together, let's continue the journey,
We've got more history to make

So onward DNC soldiers
Onwards!
Determined!
United!
Together!

Join us independents,
Republicans welcome
Liberals Ideologists
Come one, come all

Let's show the world
All's not lost for
That United States of America
TOGETHER WE CAN MAKE A DIFFERENCE.

VOGUE GAVE ME HUGE BALLS....and an insight into my allergies.

This evening, prior to dragging myself to the gym in a valiant effort to stave off unemployment blight around the mid-section, I decided to attack the huge pile of junk mail and magazines threatening to fall off the table and kill my loyal furry husband.

While going through the numerous offers of high-interest, low-limit credit card offers, and browsing through the numerous coupon catalogs the mailman daily insists on cramming into my letterbox, I came across the last two issues of VOGUE still encased in their protective mailing plastic. These had been placed on the table in the hopes that one day they would win their eternal battle with cable TV and be read.

I don't know what came over me but in an instant I decided that I would brave the prejudices of my gym - the bastion of heterosexuality here in the Chicago suburbs - and carry the May issue of VOGUE to read while walking on the treadmill. "It may be the epitome of heteros here - but it is still gay church to me," I thought as I got into my car.

As I walked to the entrance of the gym my bravado faltered slightly and I decided to fold the magazine in half lengthwise with the masthead hidden - after all, I did not need to advertise my business to the sweaty young punks that frequented the establishment.

I scanned in my tag at the entrance to register and walked confidently to the bank of treadmills at the far side of the room. Halfway to my destination I got bolder and brashly released my hold on the loose end of the magazine - holding it by the spine, not caring if anyone sees the cover. "I mean, it's not as if I am drawing attention to myself..." I told myself as I carried out the action.

As soon as that thought ran through my brain no less than four of those numerous postcard sized, no-postage necessary subscription offers that are crammed in every issue easily slid out of the magazine and fluttered loudly to the ground, the brightly advertised SUBSCRIBE TO VOGUE NOW printed in bright 4-inch red letters face-up for all passer-bys to see. One even landed right by the foot of a young, buffed, much tattooed personal trainer giving tips to his client.

Although I was totally mortified I held my head high, picked up the advertising litter from the floor, crumpled and tossed them without flourish into the trash not DARING to look to either side. I continued my walk to the bank of treadmills and thought to myself, "Lord, you sure have a warped sense of humor...."

..................................................................................................................................................

While on the treadmill I came across an article theorizing why reports of allergies are increasing as each year passes. The writer interviewed members of the medical world who theorized many reasons - one which attributed the increase to the rise in carbon dioxide and subsequent global warming. The thinking behind this is that more CO2 in the atmosphere has boosted the annual production of blooms on trees and plants (that thrive on CO2) saturating the air with more pollen than normal. Also, with global warming spring has been arriving earlier and earlier starting the blossoming season earlier and lasting longer. society. Today's population is being exposed to pollen and microbes from lands that were previously unattainable to most people.

Another hypothesis is based on modern society's obsession with cleanliness. The more we clean, the less microbes we expose ourselves to - leaving us with a weaker than normal immune system to cope with the bombardment of various germs and bacteria of highly our integrated society .

..................................................................................................................................................

I finished my 45-minute torture on the treadmill - my head filled with bold designs from Prada, tailored cuts from the master Dior, classic lines from Chanel, clunky-but-divine shoes from Gucci and Louis Vitton - and decided to leave my read copy of VOGUE on the treadmill, available for a fashion thirsty female patron....or maybe a closeted male vamp?

The torch had been passed and without incident. It only goes to show - vogue IS accepted everywhere.